NINETEEN YEARS ON I STILL FEEL THE LOSS ...

Exactly 19 years and 2 months ago the curtain of Life on My dad drew to a close. Year in year out memories of him flood my thoughts, daily I feel his absence and more often I conjure images in my mind of things we would have done together were he alive. Often I think about him and how different life would have been for my siblings and I, an absence so intense I have never come to terms with. I catch myself thinking silly and sometimes wishful thoughts of how we would have gone through the menses conversation, the first boyfriend, numerous heartbreaks, current lifestyles, my party animal stints in campus, my restless job changing and I mostly I smile because I know he would never have judged me and if he meted punishment I know in my heart he would have done it so lovely.

I remember vividly as my sister, brother and I run to his bedroom as we did every morning since he got ill for chitchat and so that he could catch up on our school work and whatever else was going on in our young lives.  It mostly centered on us complaining “ooh daddy she did this, “huyu alinichokoza” or we want something be it a book, crayons, toys or shoes. Then I was 7 years old and so full of life. At that time he had been bed ridden for a while and could not say or do much on his own.  One thing I remember though is his hearty laughter, the endless tickles we received and though weak his determination to sharpen our pencils, his endless reassurance that all will be well. I did not then understand what he meant by this but we would usually just lie there on his bed listening to him talk , help with our homework and even sharpen our pencils  until one of the grownups came to wade us off to school or just simply to let him catch  some rest

But then came that fateful morning, expecting things to be as usual we run into his bedroom but other than finding him asleep or doing his crosswords we were met by an empty bed,  the three of us  sort of in unison started calling out “daddy daddy daddy….and that’s when we saw him, daddy lay there on the floor… and with no immediate understanding of what had transpired late in the night we walked towards him, and I remember a fear, so fierce, so great, and greatly foreign tag at my heart. On reaching him his eyes were shut, he looked pale and on touching him, he was so cold … we tried waking him up, teasing, nudging him but there was no response and that’s when one of my uncles walked in on us and took us out of the room, we tried to bite, fight and even get back into the room but we could not.  I felt a pain so intense… and that’s when it dawned on me, Daddy was no more, my usually bright and happy world just came to an end that morning.  I lost the one and only parent that had been there for us through thick and thick, the one parent who had been a mom and dad to me and my siblings, I lost the anchor in my life.

A lot of years have gone by and I won’t dwell so much on what happened in the period after he was laid to rest and now because so much has transpired, some incidents so painful, so heart wrenching and some, things a child should never bare on their own. I grew up so fast and unfortunately forgot to be a child. The things daddy used to make sure we got, be it basic material things, things as simple as love, companionship and laughter became luxury overnight. For I  owe it to myself to daily struggle to be a better being, to be happy, to find love and to honor my late dad, even if it’s in spirit.  I struggle with making the most of everything, making decisions that although at times not good but the best at the time considering the circumstances. But despite my loss all wasn’t lost. Lady luck smiled on me, I was born into a family with a loaded paternal grandfather, go to Kericho county and mention my surname and I assure you, I am royalty not the Nairobi hustler you know, the Prince William kind of thing and all that comes with it, but that’s not all my grandpa is famously known for, Grandpa affectionately known to me as #Batany and #Kimoro in my region has a heart of cold, is so principled but very kind and generous as well.. And so the second phase of my life started under the watchful eyes of my grandparents, and he with the support of my beautiful forever young grandma tried as much as he could to make sure school fees is paid, we are cloth and fed and that we never ever lacked but despite all these there was an emptiness, so loud and intense, a wish full thinking for a normal childhood, for things the way they had been with daddy.

I remember vividly a Christmas incident in the late  90s, it’s so clear it’s like it happened just yesterday our extended family were all gathered, I come from a really huge family with my granddad having two wives. On this particular Christmas, other than the overall family photo we had to do family portraits and when it came to our turn, it had my sister, brother and I. And that’s when I realized we will never be like the rest of my cousins and we had to make do of what we had.

Then high school came and with a lot of inner turmoil, adolescents checked in and I rebelled so so much because I felt no one understood me, it’s funny the only thing that kept me going is the desire to make my late father proud, I mean on several occasions he had always told me I will be someone great some days. I had always topped my class all through elementary school but come high school I was more concerned with just completing the 4 years. It’s during high school that I sort God as things were so crazy if I am to pen down everything it will sound like a teenager high on drugs or suffering from suicidal tendencies. At some point I didn’t know if I was craving love, attention or it was just sheer hopelessness. Luckily in form3 I was lucky to get a desk mate called Carol who understood me and sort of became my confidant, even encouraged me. Then I had just been diagnosed with High Blood Pressure, she stood by me and its then she encouraged me to find a different way of healing especially through things that I like. I love writing and its then other than the journal I have kept since I was 7 I started writing poetry, short stories and even got to write for the hottest teen magazine in town

I am now past my mid-twenties and as much I have shed a lot of tears, made a lot of mistakes, taken a lot of risks but I feel that if daddy is looking down on me from above he would be proud of the young lady I turned out to be. I have loved and cried in equal measure. I have hurt, been hurt and disappointed so many times I stopped counting. I have fallen and sometimes so hard , a lot of people wrote me off, but you know what, every time I reach and hit rock bottom is where I find my true self, it’s when the greatest value he instilled in me stand strong, humility, perseverance, hope and the love of God. Every time I go through a dark or hard time, tears flowing endlessly it’s at this point that I remember how much my daddy loved me, loved me unconditionally even when he was in so much pain and its with this realization that I look up to God, and sort of in comparison realize that if an earthly father loved me that much then God, my heavenly father’s love must be greater in ten-folds.

And today until Sunday as people the world over celebrate father’s day I want to salute my late father #John Kiprono Kirui Belyon, although nineteen years have gone by I dearly hold on to memories of you ,near in spirit yet so far away…you will always be a true hero in my eyes.. Guess what Sunday being the actual father’s day I would have taken you for lunch all on me, I work nowadays you know.

Look What We Found

The shape of things to have….

In 2012 Fashion definitely favors both form and function. By Sandra Belyon

In the recent past Kenyans in general have been ridiculed and accused of having a poor sense of style and at times referred to as lacking in Fashion by those responsible in rating Fashion in this beautiful continent and the East African region as a whole where neighboring countries like Uganda and Tanzania are said to have better tastes and fashion sense. I do not know if this is the reason that has contributed to Kenyans in all walks of life improving in taste and style as evidenced by my generation. Lack of fashion sense is the last thing they would say of us especially women between late teens and mid thirties, they clothes, shoes, bags are so diverse and rich in color. Just look around you as you walk down the streets of Nairobi ,in the social places and even the work place you will be sure to find the following….

Clutch bags

This little bag is back but was first made popular in the sixties. Though the shapes were traditional or with a sling chain. But come 2012 these bags have become even more central to our looks. Many of us are turning heads with them in interesting shapes, textures, sizes and even color. The price range is between Ksh. 50 to as much as Ksh. 6000 depending on where you shop

Rectangular faux snakeskin by Nine west

Mock-croc with a silver arm handle

Silver leather bow tie

Grey Fold Over by Sissy Boy

Salmon with Buckles by Nina Roche

Cream Shell Shaped

Yellow patent leather oversize

BELTS

An unusual belt buckle draws a lot of attention to person wearing it i.e. it has the effect of a cinched -in waist- the key feature in a woman’s body, makes your appear thinner and even sometimes acts as an accessory to your outfit

Black patterned skinny with a bow tie buckle

Red patent leather with gold discs as buckle

Gold belt with diamante buckle

Purple elastic belt with rose flower buckle

Green double buckle leather belt

Gold and Brown Leather with studs and plates

PERFUME

A good perfume can work wonders not just to keep at bay the sweaty odors but to portray your personality, taste and even further your class. A lot of times it also helps to build self esteem and boost your confidence, question is what’s your scent…is it any of the following?

Floral

Natural smells

Oceanic Smells

Fruity Smells- Tropical, Minty

Food smells- Chocolate

ACCESSORIES

You can be wearing the most beautiful dress, suit, in your sexiest outfit but you still feel like something is missing to complete your dress up puzzle…..and you are right….we found them for you

One of the following could do the trick for you

A watch

A necklace or chain- could be a tribal necklace or a simple gold chain

Sunglasses

Make Up

Small piece jewellery-bracelet, ring earrings

OF CAMPUS, JOB HUNTING AND JOB JUMPING

When we finish high school we are quick to answer anyone who asks us what our plans are...and its the usual dribble, i wanna join this or that university to pursue A B C D so that i can be a doctor, an architect, a nurse, an engineer and the list goes on and on..

Then you join campus and a few units later you start doubting your dreams of ever being that whatever title you had chosen...and instead of truly examining yourself you start drowning your sorrows in anyone and anything and this is when studying for CATs seem like the KCSE exams you left behind. Attaining average grades like Cs make you feel like you aced your exams

And before long you become a Group Think follower, that's the thing that many people tend to refer to as peer pressure. Where they go you go, and before long you are the life of the party and everyday to you is a day to party . Even better, you happen to know all the latest joints to hang out in, the coolest people and broke or otherwise you will do anything to get there.

Then second year passes by and being in campo feels more like a punishment than pursuit of knowledge. Attending class is like the dreaded visit to the dentist, and you classify all your lectures as boring, shady or not of any brain value to you but somehow once in a while the thought of your parent or guardian even sponsor sort of sobers you up and you attend class,  at least twice or thrice the whole sem. But its worse for those who attend those so called christian universities like #Daystar some of us went to, where there is a percentage you have to meet for class attendance , all i can say you can only manage this by the grace of God  especially when you factor in the conflicting lifestyles, where one wants to impress  peers and the other  be able to graduate. The institutions fail you if you miss more than three classes a semester

Then third year checks in and you have developed thick a skin like that of a snake, nothing shocks or fazes you. All innocence lost and if any is left its quite dismal. Some even a master of several vices some they never ever thought they could stand. Then they are those good girls gone bad,  daddy's little princess now the slut of the campus, Miss goody two shoes Carol now the campus chain smoker and anything else illegal. And at this point all you look forward to is attaining a degree regardless of what class it will be ranked in, so that you can at least get yourself a job good enough to earn you a pay to cater for your basics, nothing too fancy nor colorful

All these while dreams of that big career are long forgotten in the Kaburi of Sahau. In fact should you be keen by mind second year many campo peeps change their degree courses to something less taxing as they feel the need for more time for themselves or a course that would not demand a lot of them

And fourth year zooms in and very few are usually pleased with what empty shell their lives have been, and this is when some plead with their parents for more money using excuses to explain the number of retakes or why they will not be graduating come the end of that academic year. Retakes, regrets and more retakes. Every time the new class list is out and your name is called out you feel like a Zinjanthropus...

And it comes to pass in the new year of our lord you graduate and move on to the job searching, hunting hustler ambitions. Boring 8 to 5 becomes your in thing, the bad paying job even the uncomfortable long Matatu rides to and from work. A few weeks into a job you feel caged, start complaining about your supervisor and before you know it the job is not challenging enough and their begins another job search, a quest for more or better pay

A few interviews later you land another job, more often than not its a Mhindi boss or a stuck up Miro with mid life crisis and its worse, more like jumping from the frying pan into the fire. And since you don't want your pals to judge you or your next employer to think you are unsettled you hang in there and take all the pig feeds.

And it goes on and own. But now its no longer about career or money, its more about comfort and the peace that comes with paying you rent on time, a job that's dependable, a boss that gives you room to wiggle, dream even. A boss that trust you ability to get the job done... and then it hits you Going to campus has nothing to do with career paths, they are those who are meant to follow their passions to the end, those who follow family legacies, those who achieve their parents dreams but there are those, who happen to be majority who just wanna get by, put food on the table, have a roof over our heads and have a good time...as long as you are at PEACE that's all that counts!

Hands Across The World - ONE8

Random thoughts

I thought this would be interesting ,bit boring but who the hell cares this Is not that KCSE Math paper i stared at after i did what i thought i knew....at least i got a D+  THOUGH I TEND TO THINK SOMEONE SLEPT ON THE JOB....okay seriously here i am spending my precious lunch time putting up and together my thoughts on a subject(love life) which even renown psychologists world over are still trying to understand let alone figure out. Researchers pia bado hawajafika kuitoboa hii myth and may not in the next millions of years to come, when i should be in my usual spot sleeping or at least devouring some sort of novel even if its a MILLS AND BOON(Ooh yes i still read them). Anyway picture this Mina meets nice boy, nice boy likes her but what happens next Mina writes him off . He came across as boring, dressed too kawa, mummy's boy or too clingy, stingy even mean to himself, anaishi kwao yet he makes more than 180k, kuwa serious,...WALAI HII NI NINI!
Mina meets boy two, has a decent job, good age but lives in an SQ, talks too much about himself she axes these one too as too proud and bila ambition..Ambition eeh  SERIOUSL! Hehe she does not even understand but still how do you date a dude hana kwake?
Then Mina meets boy three.Oooh... looks nice, stable job, dresses well, good company but he ngoas sana (azin extremely) and does not use any cologne so that horrid smell of sweat too much to vumilia- decision made PAP-No way! Hell no . Time for boy number4, everything is perfect, interesting but he is a little bit intimidating, quite mysterious even, oozing confidence and an obvious bad boy but guess what the heart is beating so fast in her chest and its singing loudly..."He is the one..ooh this is the one." She forgets  to see how wrong on so many angles he is, many times he is such an ass. Seriously kwani ni how? She refuses to think or to see things as they really are, Does not want to understand this things in there true depictions, throws away caution to the wind, discards the check list she so painfully spent long hours on of what she wants in a man, in a relationship .
HEARD FROM SOMEONE THAT RELATIONSHIPS DO WORK,  THOUGH YOU HAVE TO BE ENSLAVED TO PRAYER(no pun intended here). She tries often to make do, to look the other way and often she ends up laughing and pitying herself because all or most of the stuff  she has gotten out of this are so superficial. She starts having self doubts... Well but he is so good looking, so handsome as it could be, And when she wrote a list it was all stuff to do with what he can do for her, remember those benefits you can get from a man only, yeah those ones, he is loaded,drive a good car not just any other car, own a hao, mambo ya kurent zii duu bilaz.. pathetic...that is way obvious now.

All this might might sound lame to you but  honestly who still writes kind, loving, smiles a lot, handsome only in their ideal man check list? at least not me but it would be a plus if i got the nice things along with stability, security and a comfortable life....anyhow a lot of us women have amuad to live life like that, not so carefree but definitely not uptight or naive to reality. The heart may want what it wants but you cannot let its deception and vulnerability guide your whole life. Sometimes you got to get a hold of your emotions so that you can master the game of life. Do you have to tore the lines? Even if you do it does not guarantee a life without disappointments or hardship...that’s why we are human.. we keep breaking them rules because often than not living by the book sucks, and its usually fun breaking them
I think when other peoples’ suns are setting that when the sunrise for others will take place ...a little bit twisted huh? only to the closed-mind maybe, not me, ask anyone.We work best in the dark, meaning? sijui sana.. but we often give our all or our best in situations that seem so bleak. So who is your i deal man/woman? I believe she/he be at least human  to start with, that i am so sure and certain of, not some alien specimen...Are you seriously reading this? taking it seriously? you jua there is days i thought maybe relationships aren’t my thing till i was in one and i was too good at it i started getting too comfy so i got scared and run...now I am back to square one where you start putting things like self belief in place.  I honestly don’t know how dem things dem work...i find a way of coming up with my own ways...maybe they ain’t  the norm ..or my thing at all  but atleast it sort of helps me see how free my thoughts can get. Not good at it yet but NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE,
Before i didn’t take kindly to be ignored, but you know what, its part of life, you will in the very least learn something from it, its hard kidogo tho. I also felt the need to be reassured but shida ni mingi...watu wana shida mob sana hadi mine looks trivial, so f**k reassurance...just live life as it is, or if u need it reassure yourself  period or even better call your mother, she is the only one who sees an angel in you...Kiss all that negativity and then i cant attitude goodbye and start living at least...there is someone out there in so much pain, someone suffering from a terminal disease and they know they aint got so much time. You have never believed in yourself? Then time is right to start doing that..i also at one point never believed in myself, it has taken me so long but i knew it starts with me for others to believe in you, realize what you are good at so that they may appreciate or at least realize you are actually good at something...so where had you buried those big dreams...?aah SASA its time to unearth them ! kisses y'all

ALPHA MALE

Alpha males automatically assume a high status position
Alpha males are ballsy enough to be playfully cocky with their humor
Alpha males are confident
Alpha males are masculine
Alpha males aren't afraid to take the lead

In human societies alpha male can mean very different things. Some use the term to mean the guy who seems most at ease with women and can essentially marry or date any woman of his choice. In this sense the alpha male is often good-looking, has a great build, and may have a relatively high socioeconomic status. These distinctions may be less noticed in human groups like high school settings. Generally the alpha males (or a group of alpha males) are the cutest guys, usually muscle-bound, sometimes the “jocks,” while beta males may be less assured around females and may participate in less “male” activities.
The guys who join math teams or play chess at lunch are usually the beta males and may be thought less attractive by girls. It should be noted that “nerds” (and here we use the term fondly and affectionately), are becoming increasingly popular. As long-term mates or “boyfriends,” they stereotypically on average tend to be nicer and more respectful toward girls. This article also does not imply that all attractive males are necessarily alpha. Alpha males are more about exhibiting traits that are essentially masculine or “macho.” Many attractive males are beta to the core when it comes to relating with people.
In work settings, the alpha male may be a natural leader, exuding confidence. But he also may be contentious, demanding and difficult to work with. This is thought to be in part due to the alpha male attempting to retain his stature, however unconsciously, as alpha. Being the top salesperson, the quickest worker, the most aggressive boss may contribute to remaining at the top, and the alpha male has a tendency to respond aggressively to any attempts by others to outshine him.
Though leaders in a company are excellent to have, alpha male characteristics in the workplace may not always be seen as positive. Aggression and disregard for others are not necessarily inspiring. Some people better lead by being “beta” and having good communication skills, sensitivity toward others, and downplaying their strengths so they can showcase the strengths of others.
In adult social settings, alpha males again may be judged not so much by aggression, but by their ability to get the most attractive women as mates. This is the primary reason for alpha behavior in other animals.
The alpha male in adult society is likely to be confident, attractive, and wealthy. Questions remain as to whether the alpha male can retain mates, since relationships often require ability to compromise, to discuss feelings and to be sensitive. Some alpha males have these characteristics typically thought of as beta, but many of them lack such traits. You can certainly point to prominent alpha males in our society who seem to have poor track records with women, either involving themselves in a succession of failed relationships or marrying one woman after another, with no marriage lasting for very long.
The Alpha Male term is commonly used on the hit TV series Survivor (17 seasons). It's applicable to the muscular, stronger males who may dominate physical orientated challenges. They usually don't get voted off in the beginning (need them for team challenges) but they get voted off in the middle of the show (so no-one faces them at the end). The personalities all vary: some are quiet, low key while others are very abrasive, confrontational. Regardless, these guys stick out in the crowd based on their nice physical features.
As humans, we share similarities to other animals, and thus can reflect social behaviors, such as being an alpha male. The Alpha male, where it is present in non-human animal groups, is a being that has characteristics of "leading the pack" in their evolution. Wolves do it because physical prowess and strength, amongst other things, shows that the species will essentially continue to live and succeed. Alpha females support this idea as well. In human animals, female and male roles can both lead to this succession. Alpha roles should be defined in humans as leaders that promote communal succession (thrive, grow and prosper) that harmonize environmentally with our ecology. Managers are not leaders. Corporations are not leaders. Dominators are not leaders. I suppose this might suggest that these leaders would be a yin\yang balance of beta and alpha for humans.
Then everything includes itself in power, Power unto will, will into appetite; And appetite a universal wolf.Shakespeare, Troilus and Cressida.
In everything there is a leader, someone in charge, that person who runs things, the one who stands out from the crowd or pack, that special person whom everyone always seems to look up to and wants them to lead. That is the alpha or number one male. Make no bones about it; the alpha male exists in all species of animals, especially those who cohabit in groups.
At a glance you may think that a pack of wolves or a pride of lions is nothing but a motley collection of wild beasts with no order or system to them. But there is method in their seeming mayhem, as there is a hierarchy, a disciplined order that is never broken, for if it is, punishment will be meted out, swift, just and sure.
Even those wild dogs of Africa, perhaps the most feared hunters because of their tenacity and ability to relentlessly pursue prey until they catch them or the hapless animal simply drops from exhaustion, even they have a social order with the alpha male being in charge. After the hunt, he eats first, and naturally gets the choice cuts. Well, so it is with man, with the alpha male standing out from the rest of the pack, and getting the choice pieces of life, the biggest slice of the pie, and of course the best women. Speaking of women, nature is an equal opportunity employer as some species do have the alpha female, but they are not as numerous as the alpha male. But back to the women.
Didn't I tell you, the alpha male gets the choice females, for that's one of the main perks of being alpha, you get all the fine women. It's good to be the alpha. So throughout history, there have been many notable alpha males, kings, emperors, princes, presidents, dictators, prime ministers, popes, dons, any man who runs things, is in charge, is an alpha male. Some are born to it, others achieve it, while many have it thrust upon them. But those are the obvious ones, the alpha males in the public spotlight whom we read about or see all the time. There are countless others who exist, and here's how to spot them.
The alpha male exudes confidence, that's the most important quality. Without confidence and a great deal of self-esteem, one cannot be an alpha male. With this confidence oozing from his every pore, the alpha male assumes, rightly or wrongly, that the world is his, and everything in it is for his taking.
All before him, especially women are there to do his bidding, and they should be happy, just to be in his company. When he enters a room all eyes shift towards him, women stare in awe, men in dismay and jealousy, for the alpha male is perceived as a catch by women, but a threat by men. "Who is that man who just came into the room?" "I don't know, but he must be somebody, for he acts like he owns the place." In stark contrast, a non alpha male can come and go all of twenty times and no one even notices.
But the alpha male is special. Try and think back to your childhood, or even to the teenage years, and you'll see that alpha males were a breed unto themselves. We’re. they were always appointed form prefects, team captains, class monitors, president of this, chairman of that, executive officer of so and so organization. Anywhere they went; the same guys kept getting leadership positions, while others were just mere drones in the social hierarchy, there to take up space, to follow orders, while the alpha male led. The alpha males were missed if they were absent for even one day, whilst some boys could be absent for an entire term without their absence being noticed. Such is the aura of the alpha male.
With this confidence, the alpha male can approach any female that he desires and put argument to her, usually with a high success rate. This is not to be confused with stupid brash arrogance which is a turn-off. The irony is, women love confident men, and confidence is necessary to approach women, so the alpha male simply cannot lose. Haven't you noticed how some men always manage to get the prettiest, brightest and best women, all the time?
That's because they are alpha males and women are drawn to them. In stark contrast, many men, even with the biggest houses, fanciest cars, large bank accounts, still can't get quality women, but resort to 'buying' pretty, trashy gold-diggers instead. Even in the jungle the females will only mate with the alpha males, for they know that the lineage will be strong.
Some societies call it class, and a classless person who wins the lotto and becomes suddenly wealthy is still a classless person, but now only with money. So you can't become an alpha male through instant riches, it's cultivated. Nobody wants a second-rate, yub-yub, pop-down, low-life man, but would rather be with the alpha male. So the alpha male gets the pick of the females and sires their young. The females are in their power, have no control and are inexorably drawn to them, like the moth to the flame, as they lose control. "I just can't help myself, I know that he has a history with women, and that he uses and discards, but I just can't help it, I'm so drawn to him." Such is the allure of the alpha male.
The alpha male knows how to dress. Not one for gaudy, garish, outlandish, outrageous clothing, he is the master of casual yet elegant understatement but can step up to a stylish suit when necessary. Usually it's those alpha wannabes who dress like peacocks on crack and would be called poppy show by the older folks. With nothing to offer, they depend on their loud clothing to make a statement for them. The fabric screams, "See me here, I'm right here, look at me." The alpha male does not do that, and is usually a picture of sartorial elegance, always well put together, well groomed, and properly colour-coordinated.
You will definitely not see an alpha male in a green shirt, red pants, brown shoes, polka dot tie, diamond socks and a pink handkerchief hanging out of his back pocket. That's no alpha male, that's a secondary joke. Even so, alpha males do not spend all their time grooming themselves and trying to be the ultimate metro sexual. Alpha males are real men, and know that it's natural to buss a sweat now and then and get down and dirty. Alpha males are usually into sports and recognize that the body is a temple and must be respected and kept in good condition. In most cases the alpha male excelled in sports and did well at the prep, primary and tertiary levels. Usually they still participate long into their working life, still finding time to run up and down, adhering to the principle that a fit mind and fit body go hand in hand.
Masters of time management, the alpha male has others looking on in awe and saying, "But how does he find time to do so many things?" Alpha males have a joie de vivre, a zest for life, a positive attitude that invariably lands them in top managerial positions. Alpha males are always in demand, leading some people to say, "But how him so lucky, always getting those great positions?" But it's not merely luck, for the alpha male creates his own luck and turns adversity into opportunity. Take away all that he has, and he will acquire it all over again, plus more.
Alpha males are not overconfident, but also know their limitations. They know what they can do and what they cannot do. So what they cannot do themselves, they delegate to others. That's why alpha males are good managers. Now it's not a question of being handsome, tall, muscular, bright or overly educated that makes an alpha male, but rather an air of confidence, a sense of calm, high self-esteem and a penchant to take charge of situations. Like I said before, some are born to be alpha males, others achieve it, while some have it thrust upon them through situations beyond their control and just have to assume the mantle of confidence, leadership and authority. The alpha male is a special person..

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My lousy day

Today has been great, it started off really well until the end of the day when all came tumbling down,  i have been waiting for clients feedback the whole day then just when i wanna leave for home they send me there response how now.

Anyway i decided to just hang back and work, its almost 8 in the night but considering the crazy Nairobi traffic i accepted a Karaoke date from this two hot Naija boys i met during our MTV Africa Music Awards,
i pray it does the trick of cheering me up because as of now i feel right now, hmm quite lousy, tired and lonely but at least  they are kinda cute though, too cultured  than my Kenyan broadas so lets cross our fingers that the evening will bring back joy in ma life...... it has to

Especially after i had such a busy weekend .....and that mama saying she doesn't have time to deal with young girls with no common sense, that's was quite a catchy phrase i should say..because really what does common sense have to do with being young?